Sheetal Potdar

As I sat in the darkness unable to sleep, I reached for my phone. I could not bear the internal monologue of my brain, and needed some noise to drown it out. It dawned on me that I would much rather do something that is harmful to my eyes, than be alone with my thoughts. Why?

Naturally, I turned to the internet to answer this question. To my surprise, I found this interesting study, wherein the researchers addressed this very question. They asked college students to sit in a room alone, without any devices, books or writing material, doing nothing, for six to 15 minutes. They were allowed to do nothing but think, and rate the experience on various scales after the time period. Many students reported not enjoying the experience at all.

Initially, the researchers suspected that the unfamiliar environment made the students uncomfortable. To test this, they repeated the experiment at the participants’ homes. I decided to try this for myself. The next day, I sat alone at home, without distractions from my phone, TV, chores, or even the view from my balcony. To my frustration, I couldn’t last long. Similarly, in the experiment, about a third of the participants (32%) admitted to cheating by using their phones or turning on the TV.

In yet another experiment in the same study, 67% of male students and 25% of female students chose to self-administer a mild but painful electric shock rather than endure the discomfort of sitting idly with their thoughts! Interestingly, these same students had earlier indicated they would pay money to avoid being shocked. This startling experiment illustrates the depths of our discomfort with our own thoughts, to the point where self-inflicted pain feels preferable to mental solitude. Again, why?

Unpacking the Discomfort

The study explored one hypothesis – perhaps the discomfort stemmed from self-critical thoughts during these quiet moments. To investigate, researchers analyzed the linguistic content of participants’ thoughts, examining whether people who disliked the experience tended to focus on negative or self-critical ideas. Surprisingly, they found no strong relationship. Those who disliked the experience did not think more negatively about themselves than those who enjoyed it.

So, why is it so difficult to sit with our thoughts? Since I couldn’t find clear answers in the research or elsewhere on the internet, I decided to formulate my own hypotheses.

1. Increased Anxiety

Sitting idly can amplify feelings of restlessness and anxiety, especially about pending tasks. When we’re alone with our thoughts, unfinished responsibilities might come rushing to the forefront, making the experience stressful.

2. A Pinballing Mind

I noticed that my thoughts ricocheted between topics, making it hard to focus on a single idea. Interestingly, the study attempted to address this by providing participants with prompts to guide their thinking, but this didn’t significantly improve their experience.

3. Technology Overload

In today’s world of constant stimulation, our brains might be conditioned to associate thinking with external inputs, such as music, videos, or social media. Anecdotally, I’ve observed this tendency in myself and others, although thinking about important topics happens during walks in nature. The study tested people across a wide age range (18-77 years) and found that the discomfort wasn’t limited to the younger, “internet generation.” However, it would be interesting to test this hypothesis on individuals from societies without exposure to modern technology, such as isolated tribal communities.

4. Evolutionary Roots

Looking back to prehistoric times, perhaps early humans couldn’t afford to sit idly. Doing so might have had life-threatening consequences, like missing signs of danger. Over time, natural selection could have hardwired our brains to associate inactivity with risk. It’s possible that what we find aversive isn’t the thinking itself but the lack of external activity. It would be intriguing to explore whether the brain’s “punishment” pathways are activated during such periods of inactivity.

Final Thoughts

That’s all I have for now. If you’ve ever felt uncomfortable being alone with your thoughts, you’re not alone. I encourage you to try the experiment for yourself: spend just 10 minutes without distractions and observe how you feel (and let us know about it). Perhaps you’ll uncover your own insights, or come up with newer hypotheses to address this universal human feeling.

If you’ve come across any evidence supporting or contradicting these hypotheses, I’d love to hear about it! For now, this question has occupied my mind enough for sleep to finally take over.